By Jeremy Kinser
Photography by John Skalicky
www.skalickyphoto.com

Steven, I enjoyed your show very much. Unlike many one-man shows that are little more than vanity productions, your story is actually compelling and has an arc to it. What inspired you to put your story on the stage?

I wrote it as a reaction to my excommunication, which I felt was a medieval, barbaric practice. I was afraid that if I died there was no one I could truly trust to tell my story. As a gay dad I took it on so my children would know how much I love them. I also wrote it to deal with recovery. I had my own demons, so dealing with being a recovering prostitute, I wanted other people to know that no matter what they’re dealing with, they can reclaim their life.

How has the show changed since its premiere?

When I first premiered the show in Salt Lake City, it had a real musical-comedy feel to it. It completely sold out. It moved a lot of people, and I knew I was on to something. I got the courage to tell the whole story. It used to just be about my excommunication and being a gay dad.

Some of your most riveting material comes from your admission of drug abuse and working as an escort.

Adding that really balanced the story. I had recently stopped escorting and using crystal, and it was scary to divulge all of that, [but] it made it more of a human story, not just a gay one—going from one extreme to another and learning to stop being a victim and reclaiming your life no matter of the circumstances you’ve been dealt.

Is there any material that you deemed too personal to include?

The escort montage is a thumbnail sketch of just how much escorting I did. I did it nine months intensely—full time.

Wow. What’s been most rewarding about getting your story out there?

When I got to do the show last year at Lincoln Center as a fundraiser for the Point Foundation, we raised $600,000 that night for scholarships for gay kids who’ve been disowned by their families.

So you’ve gone from being a meth-addicted sex worker to playing Lincoln Center. That’s inspiring.

If I can be a former prostitute and play at Lincoln Center, I want the audience to leave and wonder what’s possible for them.

What kind of feedback have you received from other people raised in the Mormon faith?

Conservative Mormons thank me for not bashing the church. Other gay Mormons and gay Mormon fathers just totally champion the story because it’s so similiar to theirs. It’s not just Mormons. People come up to me after the show and ask if I stole their journals, saying I told 90 percent of their story—and they’re Lutheran!

I think your show speaks to anyone who’s had a problem with organized religion.

I think the show speaks to all fundamentalists. The play is my contribution to ending spiritual abuse. I think there’s a link between spiritual abuse and addiction. If you buy into the idea that God is no longer available to you, and you had a spiritual life before, what do you fill your soul with? Sex, drugs, materialism ... I think it’s up to us gay men to reclaim our spirituality in the face of spiritual abuse.

Do you think it’s any easier now for gay Mormons or do you forsee the day when the church might be more accepting?

The Mormon church changes its policies when there’s a public relations nightmare. When the laws of the land change, the Mormons will come along—just like they finally gave blacks the priesthood in 1978, years after the Civil Rights movement. They were looking so bad, they had to change their policy. I think the same thing will happen [with gays]. They will have to change their policy or look so heterosexualist it will be an embarrassment to the church. I do hope it will change in the future and that my play is part of that shift.

And you’re also helping other people get out of escorting. Let’s talk about the foundation you’ve just created, lifeaftersexwork.com.

Right now it lists resources that can be of service, but in the future I hope there are stories of sex workers who’ve left the industry and moved on with their lives. There comes a time in the life of sex workers when it’s time to move on and it can be challenging. I’m not trying to get rid of sex work. It will always be there, and it was an important part of my journey, but sometimes there are pitfalls getting to the other side.

Speaking of that, do guys hit on you after the show?

Once in a while there’s an older gentleman who completely misses the point and comes up after the show and asks if I still escort. It just floors me. It’s been five years since I got paid for sex. I do get approached and tell them I don’t do that anymore.

How is your relationship with your family now?

I just spoke to my ex-wife yesterday. I see my kids all the time—I’m very involved in their lives. My mom and I are doing well. My dad and I get along. I do have a brother who’ll have nothing to do with me. I have other family members who think I’m the devil for writing this play. It’s not for what I’m saying but that I’m saying anything.

What’s your relationship status now?

I’m single ... and celibate.

I presume that’s a conscious decision.

(Laughs) Yes, it is. Between this creative work and having two kids, I would love to have a partner, but it’s not time. However, as soon as the L.A. run is done... (Laughs)