An Open Letter to a Hilton

by Charles Karel Bouley II

Dear Perez:

You don’t know me and I do not know you personally. I have occasionally read your blog, but find it far too sexist and unnecessarily vulgar for my taste. But still, I was happy for your success. You parlayed a mediocre gossip blog into a TV show for VH-1 and several other ventures. And I applaud any time an openly gay or lesbian person makes it in mainstream media. As one of the first “Queens of all Media,” as you call yourself, I delight when we make it in a business not really accepting of us in front of the camera or microphone yet.

Often I have thought you have gone over the line in terms of representing gays and lesbians in the media, but the last thing I want to do is draw a line for you. However, recently, you have done something that simply has gone too far and I now must denounce you. And I hate that. But you have sold your soul for the fame you write about—you no longer wish to be the observer, you wish to be the star. And when you cross that line, what you do publicly matters.

Recently you proudly attended the annual White House Correspondent’s Dinner. Now, you don’t cover politics or the White House, so I gather you attended as a guest of a magazine that had tickets. Gone were your trademark purple hair and outrageous fashions. Instead, you butched it up as best you could to fit in with all the “respectable” people, I suppose.

You sat silent while George Bush made jokes at the expense and blood of our nation. You remarked how odd it might be to run into Karl Rove. But my question is—what were you doing there? Was the salmon dinner you were eating while there are food riots around the world from this administration’s failed energy and food policies worth it? I mean, this was no stale chicken dinner.

Perez, in case you haven’t noticed, the Bush administration hates you, wants to make a constitutional amendment against your unions and panders to evangelicals who would just as soon see you lynched or removed from the nation entirely, along with the rest of us in the community. And while you sip on nice wine or eat great food, hopping in and out of a limo, the rest of the nation is struggling to pay for $4/gallon gas—gas that was $1.40 a gallon when these oil men you decided to dine with came in to office, so yes, their mission was truly accomplished as announced.

I know a lot of celebrities were there and you are a celebrity reporter. And I know this is about the White House Correspondents, the future reporters and not the administration. I get it. But I have trouble dining with my mortal enemies, no matter what the menu or guest list. Yes, I got an invite. I usually do, since I have been in major market talk radio for 10 years on No. 1 stations and talk to millions every time the mic is open and write for major publications. But for seven years I knew if I went, the sound of me calling Bush a war criminal over his speech might annoy other attendees.

Perez, are you gay first, or a celebrity-whore first? Because if you are gay first, then know you made no headway that night. Know you didn’t open any eyes to the gay movement or cause. Know that you didn’t advance any political agenda you may have, if you even think about such things. And know that if the neocons did acknowledge you, it was pandering.

Maybe it’s a small thing to most of you, but this administration has destroyed our nation. We are bankrupt. We borrow money from China to give it to the Saudis for oil because we have a failed energy policy. And socially, gays are still in the very early stages of our struggle for true across-the-board equality. I can’t put down those issues for a night, or as Bush said that evening, “put our differences aside for a few hours...” No, that would be like forgiving any other dictator that has killed thousands of my countrymen and women, destroyed a Middle Eastern nation in my name for no reason and caused so much prejudice

against my community through his rhetoric that he is, in fact, Public Enemy No. 1 at this point—not just in my community, but for America as a whole.

You were blinded by the star light and couldn’t see that some things are more important, like integrity. No, you were not the only gay person there that night, but you were a visible one. And, as such, you have a responsibility. Changing your entire look to fit in and then pandering to those who would oppress you at any other time isn’t my idea of a successful night, and no photograph of Pamela Lee or no little privy council or court held by you was worth the message you sent to the community: I care more about glitz than gay rights. I care more about stars than the community of which I am a member.

You could have taken a small voice recorder and walked up to each person and asked them a great question. Wasn’t it Sheryl Crow that pissed off Karl Rove last time? Did you piss off anyone by asking blunt, real questions? If so, I didn’t hear about it.

Selling us out is a not big deal, almost every openly gay person does it sooner or later for money and success. But the next time you’re dining with people who, outside the room, would all but put you in a concentration camp and you think you are changing things, think again. All you are doing is pandering.

Hope the dessert was worth it.