Intolerance is Deadly

by Michael Weinstein
President of AIDS Healthcare Foundation (AHF)

As the gay marriage debate rages across this country, there is an angle that has not often been explored. What is the impact of gay marriage on the rate of HIV among gay men? Do societal attitudes affect the way that gay men protect themselves from HIV? Two Emory University economists have found that they do.

According to the first ever study of the impact of social tolerance levels toward gays in the United States, HIV transmission rates would increase by four cases per 100,000 in a population if a constitutional ban on gay marriage was enacted. Their conclusion was: "Intolerance is deadly. Bans on gay marriage codify intolerance, causing more gay people to shift to underground sexual behaviors that carry more risk."

Society is sending a mixed message. On one hand, the government has spent billions of dollars telling us that we should protect ourselves from HIV by practicing safer sex. On the other hand, our very same government tells us that our relationships are invalid or less than. You can't have it both ways.

The gay subculture was shaped by being "outlaws." Gay men grow up in heterosexual families that at best find it hard to understand them and at worst reject them. From an early age they are told that they are not normal. Churches tell them that they are sinners. In the sensitive, formative years of growing up the message is clearly that their desires put them at the fringes of society. As a result, what is forbidden becomes even more enticing.

Young people go through a period of experimentation that puts them at risk for sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancy. This is often followed by forming committed relationships, and often by marriage. Marriage is a relationship that society elevates. In addition to the legal benefits it affords, it legitimizes the sexual relationship between two people. Marriages are celebrated by announcements, weddings, gifts and honeymoons. All of this serves to validate a person’s love of another person in the community’s eyes.

While many couples, gay and straight, have no desire to marry, the denial of the right to marriage stigmatizes gay men and makes their lovemaking illicit. Discarded by society, their inhibitions are thrown to the wind. Living in an underground world means that anything goes—including unsafe sex. If we don't want to have more "throw away" young people we have to stop telling them that they are sick, lesser and incapable of real love.

Adult gay men are not innocent victims of a hostile society. In many ways, the gay community has absolved itself of responsibility for promoting sexual health. But the original sin is making a thirteen-year-old boy in Nebraska think that he will never find love or a long-term relationship that his family and society will embrace. Why should he care to protect himself?

Sexual development is a delicate, complicated matter. It is never helped by prejudice. So, I offer one more reason to enact gay marriage—it is good for the public health.

more info: aidshealth.org