Did the LGBT community do too little, too late?

BY MIKE ROTH

My inbox is overflowing with notices of boycotts, petitions and rallies protesting the passage of Proposition 8. I'm proud that our community has finally re-discovered its political passion.

So why weren't we this engaged before the election? Why weren't we out in the streets carrying signs, holding candles and generating public support back in the spring?

Let's not forget that the Prop. 8 campaign really started in May, the moment the California Supreme Court ruled that we had the right to marry. The night the decision came down there was a rally in West Hollywood. Speaker after speaker warned that a constitutional amendment that would reverse the court's ruling was heading our way.

Sure enough, in June the Secretary of State cleared the way for a ballot initiative that would later become known as Proposition 8 when she certified the 1.1 million petition signatures that had been ceremoniously carted into her office. News of the initiative was in every paper across the state, but at gay pride a week later, how many people were wearing those blue “Vow to Vote No on the Marriage Ban” stickers? By my count, it was 5 to 10 percent.

Then came September, the start of the election season. We all had politics on our minds, but how many of us donated to the No on 8 campaign? How many cocktails were we willing to sacrifice to help fund television ads (that admittedly were weak), lawn signs and campaign staffers? Walking down Castro Street or Santa Monica Boulevard, I counted the number of No on 8 signs I saw on one hand.

For the majority of us, the wakeup call came in mid-October. The Yes on 8 ads started airing, a poll showed us losing by five points, and public records showed us outraised by $10 million. Finally people were attending rallies, donating money and, most importantly, talking to their friends, families and co-workers about Prop. 8.

But unfortunately, it was too late. The Yes on 8 side had been out of the starting gate months before we even noticed there was a race going on. They were the ones talking to their neighbors about why Prop. 8 was important to them. They were the ones making huge financial sacrifices to help fund the campaign. And they were the ones fighting with all their hearts, even though we had far more to lose.

More than any other group, we are the ones to blame for Prop. 8 passing. It's true that millions of dollars came to the Yes on 8'ers from Mormons who don't even live in our state. It's also true that the Yes on 8 television spots were deceptive. But the real reason we lost is because we didn't put our hearts into fighting Prop. 8 and we didn't make the case strongly enough to our fellow Californians how personal this fight was. If we couldn't be bothered to make it widely known that we cared about defeating Prop. 8, why would any undecided voter care either?

The one good thing that has come from this devastating loss is the unleashing of our re-found political energy. Let's invest it wisely. Remember that our end goal is not to punish Prop. 8 supporters with the boycotts and petitions we keep reading about in our inboxes. Our goal is to win back the right to marry.

While there are pending lawsuits that might overturn Prop. 8, it's also possible that we'll have to repeal it through another ballot initiative in 2010. If every person out there protesting Prop. 8 were to write a check and volunteer for a 2010 campaign, we would be incredibly powerful.

More importantly, if every person protesting took responsibility for having honest, and sometimes difficult, conversations with everyone they knew about why having the right to marry was so important to them, we would gain allies in every community that voted against us last time. Minds can always be changed, but it always takes time. We were just 2 percent short of a majority supporting us in 2008, so we have two years to make up that difference. The clock is ticking, so let's get started.

Mike Roth is a director/cameraman on documentaries and reality TV. His most recent film, Saving Marriage (co-directed with John Henning), follows the fight to keep gay marriage legal in Massachusetts (SavingMarriageTheMovie.com).