By Tony Zimbardi—Le Mons

DINING OUT

“Okay guys, time for a story and bed, what you would like me to read tonight?” I ask. “Read this one,” Jaime shouts enthusiastically, shoving one of a series of books called Why, Why, Why? into my hands. The books have titles like Why are Orangutans Hairy? and Why do Tornadoes Spin? He chooses Why Does My Heart Begin to Race? An odd bedtime selection, but I read it and begin to tuck them in. “Papa?” Edward asks as I pull his spread up under his chin. “Yes, sweetie?” “Can we give Jaime to Goodwill?” “What?” “Can we give Jaime to Goodwill? I think I’m done with him.” “No, we cannot give your brother to Goodwill, now go to sleep!” I can’t help but chuckle exiting the bedroom.

The following morning we meet the boys’ biological grandmother and sisters for breakfast at a Denny’s in East L.A.; a monthly ritual for us all. Their grandmother speaks to us in Spanish; we answer her in English. It’s one of those L.A. stories, we understand enough Spanish and she understands enough English, though none of us can articulate the other’s native language.

“I’m eating poop!” Edward announces, taking a bite out of his Mickey Mouse pancake. “What did you say?” Antonio asks. “I’m eating poop!” And with that, he takes a sip of milk and goes on to add, “And now I’m drinking pee.” “What are you talking about?” Antonio asks in amazement. “The pancakes are going into my stomach and will come out my butt as poop, and my milk is going to come out my penis as pee.” “Where did you learn that?” Antonio asks. “Papa.” Antonio looks at me with a raised eyebrow. I pause. “Oh! Our bedtime reading, Why, Why, Why? last night was What Happens to the Food I Swallow?” I explain, glad in this moment that grandma doesn’t understand much English.

I notice that Jaime is intently staring at the single mom facing him at the next table. “Hey, I know you!” he suddenly shouts and jumps up, leaping into her lap. The woman, a bit startled, responds, “I don’t think so sweetie, but it’s very nice to meet you.” Embarrassed, I gather him up and bring him back to our table, but his eyes never leave her gaze for the rest of our time there. I wonder what this is about for him.

Later that evening, we’re home having dinner. “How come we have two dads?” Jaime asks turning back toward me. “Because we’re a couple with two dads,” I reply, “You guys already knew that,” I add. “But are one of you going away sometime so we get a mom?” Jaime asks, turning toward Antonio. “Do you want one of us to go away so you have a family with a mom and a dad?” Antonio asks. “No,” Edward promptly responds with Jaime nodding in agreement. “Well then,” Antonio responds, “I guess you’re just stuck with having two dads,” and at that they giggle, and we eat.

In the next installment: Tony, Antonio and the boys prepare for their first holiday season as a family.

Tony Zimbardi Psy.D. is a psychotherapist in private practice in West Hollywood. More of his writing can be found at www.drtonyzimbardi.com.