By Jim Holmes

Getting read by your friends doesn’t always have to be about them tormenting you over a bad footwear choice or your latest love interest. As an alternative to deliberations over the availability of the boy across the bar, I chose to “literally” redirect my friendships and start connecting differently. Instead of complaining about the venues available to a single gay man, I decided it was time to live by the book. So, I started a book club. Enter “The Book Ends Club”.

Aside from gathering for a different, albeit specific reason, oddly, it was unlike anything I’d previously shared with my friends. Old friends got to meet new friends and guys from different segments of my life all came together to write a whole new and extremely enlightening chapter of my life. Aside from forming a new platform for discussions, friends I had known for years even sounded like different people as they gave their views about particular aspects of the book.

But first, there was a prologue: I had a to plan a party. And to help—should you choose to do the same—here are the things I did to prepare for my book bash:

Chapter One: Going Clubbing... without leaving the house.

How to decide on a book?

To start, you shouldn’t think of the Book Club long-term. Think about it in terms of a party. To make things more festive, theme the party around your book choice.

I chose Breakfast at Tiffany’s because I thought it easily incorporated several important aspects: It was a fabulous/festive theme for a party; it had a classic (gay) element (Truman Capote); it was a short story—thus easily read, and none of my friends had read it.

To kick things off, as a starter gift, I bought the book for each of my guests/friends—which gave me an additional reason to connect with them all—prior to the party.

To help you with your choices, I spoke with Jake (the book buyer at A Different Light Bookstore), and he was kind enough to supply a list of some suggested “Gay Classics.”

Chapter Two: Size Matters... and sometimes small is better.

Choosing the number of people is key. I chose six.

• Keep things small—no more than eight. This will allow for an opened forum so that everyone to has time as well as the opportunity to share their thoughts and opinions.

• Make sure the group includes some of your friends who (based on normal circumstances) have never met or spent time with each other.

• Try and keep romantic interests out of the equation. (And that goes for your guests as well). Enforcing singular status will allow for independent opinions and participation. I invited one of my friends, sans husband—offering him an interest and outlet that was independent of his spouse. (This adds another element of discovering new territory with your friends.)

• Invite someone into the group that you don’t know very well, but would like to become better friends with: A casual acquaintance from the neighborhood; someone you’ve said hello to at the gym for years. Having the book (club), serves as the perfect platform and neutral forum for everyone invited.

Chapter Three: Proclamation of the Pages... is a capital act

• Send your book choice (or book) along with the invitation.

• From the time you send out the invite and book pick, allow adequate time for everyone to read it. I suggest a month.

• For the initial gathering, don’t pick something too long or complex. Keep it on the light side, (in my case Holly Golightly) so it will have a festive ambiance. After that, if the group decides to continue and become a club, it will organically define itself (along with the reading preferences) as it develops.

• Include book reviews (or whatever drove you to your choice), so the group can appreciate why you choose the book.

Chapter Four: Food for Thought

As my fifth grade teacher would announce before every test, “Breakfast is the most important meal of the day! It helps promote alert thinking!” To follow her advice and induce thought-provoking conversation about the book, feed your guests. Again Breakfast At Tiffany’s was an easy segue to add some “character” to my party food. Naturally I served breakfast—Moon River Pie, and (with the help of Jerry, the bartender at Blame It On Midnight) I served a Holly Golightly cocktail. (See below for “recipe”)

Chapter Five: Tune Tone

Although you don’t want anything to interfere with the group discussion, a little music is essential to initiate the correct ambience. Mine was obviously easy: Henry Mancini. Subsequent to the apparent, I let the story—its location and period—dictate my additional choices: Pink Martini, Astrid Gilberto, and Stan Getz. You probably won’t have music playing during the discussion, but I suggest it as a kick off.

Chapter Six: Ornamentation Station

I served food on “Tiffany Blue” colored plates and we drank out of martini glasses. If you’re not into all of that, something simple like a bowl of chips is fine! As you read, with a month to decide on added touches, your book choice will speak for itself.

Chapter Seven: Alternative Episodes

• Along with each new book pick, should you decide on a reoccurring club, meet at different locations. Alternate between each other’s houses or gather in public locations that are conducive to the group or book—like a local park or Starbucks. (Special location suggestions = Elixir in L.A., Koffi in Palm Springs, The Library in Long Beach—-to name a few.

• If you decide you don’t want to commit to getting together every month to discuss the same book, start a lending library. When everyone gathers, or whenever you see your various friends, swap your favorite books and talk about them when time permits.

The End—Don’t Judge A Book Club by Its Covering

When approaching my book party/club, obviously it was elaborate in its details. Yours can have fewer complexes. If your approach to life is simple, let that dictate your book party. Let your choices reflect and expose something about yourself that your friends (old and new) have never seen.

Jake’s Picks:

The Immoralist by Andre Gide

Giovanni’s Room by James Baldwin

The Charioteer by Mary Renault

The Beautiful Room Is Empty by Edmund White

Maurice by E. M. Forster

The Front Runner by Patricia Nell Warren

Dancer From the Dance by Andrew Holleran

The City and the Pillar by Gore Vidal

Tales of the City by Armistead Maupin

Dream Boy by Jim Grimsley

Also from Jake’s picks: “The Best of the Best New Gay Fiction”

Call Me By Your Name by Andre Aciman

Michael Tolliver Lives by Armistead Maupin

Send Me by Patrick Ryan

Now Is the Hour by Tom Spanbauer

Fellow Travelers by Thomas Mallon

If the aforementioned aren’t inspiring, here are some other suggestions:

• Something adventure based—to take a different kind of trip with your friends. A head-trip to another place or time. Example: On the Road by Jack Kerouac

• Footnote—If you decide to follow the same format, thanks to the generosity of A Different Light Bookstore, utilize the coupon (at the end of this column) to receive a 10% discount when purchasing Breakfast At Tiffany’s.

Resources:

• A Different Light Bookstore (#1 LGBT bookseller in the world)—To support the gay community, log on to www.ADLBooks.com for store locations, book and purchasing information.

• www.bookcluboffers.com—A complete resource and guide for the US book clubs—gives quick access to browse other book clubs. To find, review and compare what other clubs are doing. Log on to www.bookcluboffers.com

• The Public Library—If you don’t want to buy your book each month, log on to www.lapl.org for information on library locations and ways to find/order your book.

• A Holly Golightly cocktail (from Jerry) = “Equal parts Tuaca (Italian liqueur), Tia Maria and Kahula” (I added crushed ice to my version)

• A Holly Golightly cocktail (from Jerry) = “Equal parts Tuaca (Italian liqueur), Tia Maria and Kahula” (I added crushed ice to my version)